November 20, 2016

Insecurities

Kedah sky

My own interpretation of insecurities : something you think you're lacking, envious of the person who has it, and it makes you feel down, becoming someone who lack self confidence.

I trust that everyone of you, especially us girls, ada masing-masing punya insecurities. This, includes me. So today I want to share with you my insecurities and how I overcome them, not that I managed to completely overcome them but, yea.

Friends


I bukan jenis mulut becok yang senang to get friendly with other people, especially yang baru kenal so I don't really have many friends, thus I'm not in the 'popular' group (I think everyone wants to be in such group of people).

After some time, I realized it's a bless to have few friends who's always been there for you masa you susah dan senang, instead of a bunch fake friends yang cuma nak ambil kesempatan dengan you (read : masa susah, cari, bila senang, tinggal).

p/s : I love you guys, Jiha, Husna, Alia, Najwa and Muni.

Study


Masa zaman uni, I bukan one of those yang pandai, having As for design class, plus lecturers pon asyik kutuk my design. I always, repeat, ALWAYS, compare myself to the As students, which made me felt useless.

Then I sedar tahap kepandaian I and realized that I wouldn't able to beat those As students, so instead of comparing my grades with them, I challenged my old self instead. Let's say if I got B for the particular semester, I work hard to beat that B (in term of marks) rather than terus nak dapat A. Well, I improved a lot when I finally had that mindset.

Appearance

I'm chubby, so I'm envious of those yang kurus langsing macam lidi. Pimples on my face made me envious of those who are flawless. I'm short, not even reach 5' so I'm jealous of those who are tall, having model-like figure. Having no boys trying to approach me (in a more than friend manner) also made me think that I'm hideous.

Growing up, I started to have this habit of keep telling myself that I indeed am beautiful. I mean, I can't expect people to notice my beauty if I don't feel it myself. To hell with boys, I make myself look beautiful (read : having make up on) to boast my self confidence, and I succeeded.

I learned to love myself instead. I find it to be the most critical point to boast one's self confidence. When you learn to love yourself, you'll appreciate yourself more and started to live life in a more positive manner. This, is what I'm having currently and I'm happy with it.

So do you have any insecurities? How do you handle them?

Till then,
Lya.

12 comments:

  1. Judging from your profile picture I would say that you're one cute lady. Insecurities suck but we just need to realize that our worth is not solely based on our appearance, exam results and people

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    1. thank you rasya :)
      yeah I completely agree with you but sadly insecurities come from these aspects

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  2. Yes. Until now I always keep remind to love myself more. Important part is please dont compare yourself with others. If I feel the same, cepat2 ingatkan diri untuk ignore perasaan tu :)

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    1. it's very hard to not compare ourselves with others actually but once we get over it, we'll be happier

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  3. my insecurities , totally my height and my appearance ( even I'm not that fat tapi berisi jugak lah ) ... yes , always compare myself dengan orang lain lagi2 dgn org yang model look like . wish to have that tall height .

    But, like Siqah said , kena cepat2 remind to ourself . No matter what , Just be yourself and you can get people who love you around . Dan , kita nie semua kena selalu bersyukur . Self reminder to m too .

    Hey , btw Lya . Orang tak tinggi tue cute tau just like me too!!!

    Be happy dear =)

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    1. I don't really insecure on my height but my height with my weight combined made me look like a fat goblin :( haha

      you too, be happy :)

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  4. Admitting this is just beautiful. I think the best things is to firsf admit it and after that it wasnt really insecurities anymore. It just a fight to go on and beating our own goals. Like those target u put from b minus to b. most of your insecurities are mine really . Down to pimples! got that all my life. now my biggest insecurities is no knowing what i really want from life. A true life goal. I dont want to end up feeling i should have done that before. I don't want to waste my youth. Yet, i dont know what to do.

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    1. that's complicated issue you got but I'm just the same. As I'm now an adult, while living the routine I am in now, I keep thinking that this isn't what I want my life to be but I don't know what actually I want :/

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  5. hwaaahhhhh this is so related to my previous post hehe.

    i'm so amazed with your improved english. sobsob.

    yeah everyone have insecurities, but how we handle them are what make us beautiful, different and extraordinary!

    keep writing Lya Amie! i'm a fan of this type of posts :')

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    Replies
    1. thank you, your words of encouragement really up my spirit :)

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  6. yezzaa! namaaa aku adaaa hohohohhooooo

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